poopflow:

nah mom I went to bed 4 hours ago I just woke up to go to the bathroom

d0nn0:

Me: omg babe keep it down you’re gonna wake my parents!

Computer: *huummmmmmmmmmmmmm*

juilanne:

i love typing because my fingers make that cool sound and i seem professional

childservices:

"Ima need ur license and registration……and ur kik"

muscleluvr2:

oh youre a son? name 5 of your parents

delzdesigns:

Wow, promo games actually work guys.

delzdesigns:

Wow, promo games actually work guys.

wwworldwide:

im sorry. is my swag distracting you

tyleroakley:

I HAVE NEVER BEEN SO DISRESPECTED

image

I AM IN AUSTRALIA, NOT FUCKING NARNIA

condorn:

I love the fact that my sister just turned 12 so everytime she says something stupid I just say “shut up ur like 12” and she gets pissed off and walks away

trillow:

this is the police. open up. tell me something about yourself, don’t be afraid

jonasbrothers:

cokeflow:

Shrek came out 13 years ago

I didn’t know shrek was gay

urbancatfitters:

i’ve dated at least *counts on fingers* zero people